You want your child to succeed. You do all you can to make sure success happens. But is it enough? Are you doing the right things?
Stop being hard on yourself.
There are three ways, and only three ways, you can help your child succeed in school (and in life!). When you now what they are you no longer need to stress about whether you are doing the right thing, or doing enough of the right thing to support your child’s education.
Just three ways.
And they all begin with an ‘S’.
And they are all easy to do.
How simple is that?
If all you remember this year is to do the three ‘S’s’ your child will have the best learning year of his or her life.
This is the most important of the three S’s. Show your child how to behave, how to learn, how to interact with others, how to handle frustration, how to….
Well, you get the picture.
Actually that last statement is crucial. The phrase ‘get the picture’ is all about showing.
Writers are constantly told to use words to ‘show’ rather than ‘tell’. Why? Because when you show someone something it becomes much more real, more important than when you tell someone something.
And showing your child what to do is easy.
You need to be a little more aware of your own behavior and perhaps a little more careful bout what you say, but you don’t have to take any extra training or spend a bucketful of your hard earned money!
Remember, children learn from people they love. Your child loves you and wants to be like you. You are a powerful role model for your child. Show your child what you want him or her to be like.
Again, this is really easy to do but many parents either forget about it or feel they don’t want to do it.
Share your history, life story, celebrations, feelings, happiness and even sadness. Share in ways that are age appropriate but do share.
You have so much to offer your child (in academia it is called cultural capital). Only you can share who you are and what you are with your child in ways that help him or her understand their place in the world and have the confidence to go forward to a bright future.
No one can advance unless they know where they are starting from.
This is harder to get right. But not too difficult to do if you remember one overriding principle.
Whatever you say to your child either helps or hinders their learning. Nothing you say is neutral when it comes to developing their thinking skills.
So how do you talk to your child in ways that help his or her learning?
Talk to your child in ways that are open, not closed.
Talking in a closed way does not allow your child to experiment with language or think about what you have said. For instance telling your child to ‘go to bed’ is a closed statement. The child cannot add anything to the statement (although I know that most will try!). Telling your child that it is bedtime in five minutes so how can you help him put his toys away? allows him or her to contribute to the conversation and to problem solve at the same time.
Can you see the difference?
Keep your language open, don’t shut down your child’s thinking. Then,. when you do have to use closed language – Don’t cross the road! – it has much greater impact.
The Three S’s of Success – Show, Share, Say.
Try them, you will be pleasantly surprised by the results.
Let me know what happens. I love stories with happy endings!