Actually you are probably not missing these signs as they are so apparent, but you may be missing the reason why they are there!
In my last post I wrote about seven early warning signs that your child has a learning difficulty and is underachieving in class. These signs were related to schoolwork. Today I want to warn you of the early warning signs that are emotional in nature and not specific to how your child does his work.
Most often these signs occur shortly after your child starts to have learning difficulties; occasionally they may lead to problems learning. So, these are the emotional early warning signs of learning problems that you need to watch out for.
1. Clowning around
All children like to have fun but for some children clowning around is a way of taking the pressure off being unable to do things. By clowning around, either in class or at home, your child is saying, “Look at me! Look how silly and stupid I can be!” It can be a way of hiding fears of failure by covering it up.
2. Endless talking/never talking
O.K. I admit it. When I am worried about something I stop talking. It drives my husband nuts! I have a friend who does the opposite. If she is worried about something I will now because I can never get a word in when we are having a coffee together!
If your child is mindlessly chattering away or refuses to discuss things with you chances are he or she is worried about not something and this something can be school related.
3. Lack of friends
When children have problems learning they are often spending so much energy worrying about what they can do that they have no energy left to give to other people. As a result it can be hard for them to make friends. And, did you ever notice how the most popular child is class was always the one who seemed to just breeze through the day with no problems? If your child is not making friends it could be because of learning issues. Crazy but true.
4. Restlessness
We all get restless at times, we all want to change things and make them better. But when your child is restless most of the time, unable to settle down and do things, always wanting to be moving and unable to concentrate on one task until it is completed, your child is sending you a message that he is not happy with what he is being expected to do, that he wants things to change because he is having problems doing what he is supposed to do. A sure sign that things may not be going well in school.
5. Lack of motivation
I hate to see students who never seem to be interested in learning because I know that something has happened to get in the way of their natural motivation to learn. This ’something’ is usually a learning hurdle they have come across and not been able to get over or around. They probably spent a lot of time and energy trying to do something and it never worked. As a result they begin to think that learning is a waste of time so why bother?
If your child seems unmotivated and even lethargic when it comes time to do schoolwork you need to find out why.
6. Blaming others
Not every child does this, but when it happens it is a sure sign that a child does not want to take responsibility for something, wants to get away with either not doing it or not taking the blame for something that he has been involved in. Why do children do this? It is not because of fear of punishment it is because of fear of seeming stupid or having to take responsibility for something they feel incapable of handling.
If your child only does this once or twice it may not be a problem. But if your child is constantly blaming others – even you- it is because there is something they are not willing to admit, even to themselves, and this lack of awareness will prevent them learning.
7. Everything is ‘boring’
This is closely related to #5, lack of motivation. It is another way of your child saying that “I can’t do the work because it is too difficul, and by saying that the work is boring or stupid I am giving myself a reason for not being able to get my work done”. Now I admit that some work your child might be asked to do may be boring but when you get this response to all your questions about school and schoolwork it is time to wonder what the problem is.
So, now you have some cognitive and emotional warning signs. But that is not all. My next post will be about the physical early warning signs that indicate learning issues.
